Monday, August 12, 2013

What Your Car May or May Not Say About You


FMRO (For Mature Readers Only)

“What Your Car May or May Not Say About You”

On Yahoo’s finance page a while back there was an article titled “What Your Car Says About You.” It was from Forbes and dated October ’09. In Forbes’ highly intelligent fashion, it reports that driving a Bentley indicates that you’re wealthy. Gee! Now there’s a revelation. A bit less obvious, it says that Buick owners are stodgy. As two thirds of them are apparently over 55, that may be a safe bet, although I personally would take issue at being labeled stodgy simply because I am over 55. Indeed, I’m well over 55, but then again, I’d never buy a Buick.
My Dad used to have one, though, when I was little. The model was called a Roadmaster. And at the time, he wasn’t much more than a whipper snapper. According to Wikipedia, “Between 1946 and 1957, the Roadmaster was Buick's premium and best appointed model.” Maybe he just had good taste. Wikipedia goes on to say, “The 1953 Buick Roadmaster station wagon, Model 79-R, was the last wood-bodied station wagon mass-produced in the United States.” Buick made a Woodie! I didn’t know that. According to The Old Woodie web site, “In their heyday, woodies were often the most expensive cars offered by a manufacturer and many tallied impressive sales figures.” I didn’t know Buick made a Woodie and I didn’t know a Woodie was expensive, but I do know a Woodie was not stodgy. I can’t imagine the Beach Boys ever thinking of themselves as stodgy.
If you own a Chevy or a Ford, I’ll have to explain my numbers a bit because according to Forbes, 25% of you (13% of Chevy drivers, 12% of Ford) don’t use the internet. That’s an amazing finding. But if you find yourself in that category, I can help. I can teach you to use the internet in about 20 minutes. And you’ll be hooked in less than an hour. Trust me on this. I came into the tech world early on, but I came kicking and screaming, but it’s SO fun. Not as much fun as driving a 4 speed ohc, but fun.
Truthfully, though, I’m no techie. I’m not a computer expert at all, but I do fancy myself as something of a car expert. And therefore I can take issue with much of the Forbes’ report. I fancy myself a car expert precisely because I am over 55 which means that I cut my teeth on the muscle car - in my case, the GTO. Fond memories, yet just the other day, I saw what may be my favorite bumper sticker of the decade: “Officer, I wasn’t speeding. I was qualifying.”
I don’t know where the Forbes’ author hails from, but the data he cites was gathered by a San Diego based “market research outfit.” Now that is hard to believe. In other parts of this country, the car you drive may reveal something about you, but in California, you are what you drive! And I think, like the GTO “… we’re really looking fine!”

Really old Ford folks joke about how early on in the 20th century, you could buy a Ford in any color you wanted – as long as you wanted black. And it seems to me these days that we’ve gone back to that. There are hardly any cars of color today. My girlfriend used to drive her father’s Mercury and it was pink. Another friend had a ‘57 Chevy with turquoise fins. And I drove my Dad’s two-toned green ’55 Pontiac. Cars came in colors.
When I got older and was in the market for my GTO, I wanted to buy a yellow one, but my husband wouldn’t have it. He liked the orange Judge model that came out in ’68 or ‘69, but frankly I thought it was a bit garish. Besides, the body style was round and ugly. It looked like a hunchback to me. We settled on the much more stylish l-o-n-g ‘67 burgundy model.
I learned how to drive in that old two-toned green Pontiac of my Dad’s, but my friend taught me how to drive a stick in his dark blue ’66 Mustang. It was a three speed on the column. He hardly flinched when I ground the gears: my definition of a nice guy.
When we got our GTO, my husband said I could figure it out. It was a four speed in the traditional H pattern. And the gearshift was located between the bucket seats where it belongs. The only pointer he gave me was to pay attention to the tachometer. He said I shouldn’t let the engine go into the red zone. And off I went.
It wasn’t until he went on his first ride with me a couple of weeks later that I actually got it right cause I asked him:
When do you ever get to 4th gear?
He looked at me a bit quizzically.
You see 2nd gear wound up to about 2400 rpm and the red line wasn’t until 2500. So, I’d been driving on the freeway in second gear for some time. Whoops.
My husband did flinch when I’d grind a gear which is why I asked my friend to teach me in his car, but once I learned, my husband used to love to watch me race folks – especially guys. He’d even egg me on.
Come on, Sherry, you can do it.
Get over there – indicating the right lane where cars are supposed to park. And he’d watch the lights for me.
OK. Ready?
The guy driving the other car would look and me and kinda smirk. And I’d just smile. Then he’d rev his engine and I’d rev mine. The light would change and off we’d go – clutch out, gas pedal to the metal, ease up a bit so you don’t just spin the tires. Winner.
In all modesty, it was hard for anyone to beat me. Pontiac’s 400 cubic inches produced over 350 hp and as the song says about the little deuce coupe, it really could catch rubber in all four gears. According to Wikipedia, “It was a muscle car classic of the 1960s and 1970s era. Although there were earlier muscle cars, the Pontiac GTO is considered by some to have started the trend with all four domestic automakers offering a variety of competing models.” According to me, it was just pure fun.
Cars aren’t much fun anymore. Although I test drove a Dodge the other day with a Hemi and my grandson said he’d never seen me grin so much.
Another friend of mine used to have a little sticker on his dashboard that pretty much summed up my sixties driving experience for me: gas, grass or ass – nobody rides for free.
I wrote this in 2010 just as “General Motors officially announced the end of the Pontiac brand.” On November 1, the headlines read, “Pontiac dealership agreements expired yesterday, marking the official end for GM's 84-year old.” I should look so good at 84. 10/31. Damn. Halloween will never be the same for me. And GM will never be the same. Period.

(http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/107938/what-your-car-says-about-you.html?mod=family-autos)

(http://www.oldwoodies.com/welcome.htm)